Homework Without Hassles

More Peace - August 7, 2007 - Homework Without Hassles

This Month's Issue: Since we are all thinking about the start of school (or trying not to) I thought thismight be a good time to help you get your kids on board with homework. You can work together to alleviate homework hassles before they start.

MORE PEACE - Homework Without Hassles


"Is your homework done?" Mom asks. "No, I want to playa little longer with Johnny." "Steven, you know you aresupposed to finish your homework before playing." Mom says sharply. "I know but I'm having fun and I don't have that much." Steven pleads. "I don't care how muchfun you are having. You need to come in and do yourhomework now!" Mom yells.

Sound familiar? Even if Steven does come in to do homework he's probably not feeling verycooperative or motivated. And, how do you think mom is feeling?
Often, we parents feel it is our job to be in charge of our child's homework. We want to know what the homework is, and make sure it's correct when done. We'll even deliver it right to school if forgotten. Instead of you adding homework to your burden of household duties, start the year by giving your child control.

Here's how:

1. Find ways to internally motivate your child.
* First, find out what your child's goals are. Whatdo they want to be. Help your child determine howshe can meet those goals.
* Second, ask her questions to figure out how to meet those goals.

1. How much time do you think you'll need to study each day?
2. What do you want your study space to look like?What conditions do you need to study most effectively?
3. What materials do you need?
4. What do you want the quality of your work tolook like?
5. How can I best help?
6. What method do you want to use to monitoryour daily/weekly progress?7.What planning assistance do you need? (i.e. calendar)
8. Where will you keep completed homework?

2. Teach time management. Help your childorganize projects with a planner: What projects need to be completed when.

3. Have your child determine his own consequences for the following situations:
* Forgetting homework
* Not sticking to study schedule
* Careless work
* How to get homework assignments when absent
* What should happen if a goal is not met

Have your child write all agreements,schedules and consequences. Be specificto eliminate any confusion and powerstruggles.

ENCOURAGE!

4. Make learning a family value. Establish a quiet time when everyone in the family is reading or doing something educational. Keep this time sacred, even if your child doesn't have homework.

5. Don't argue or bargain about homework time.Instead, simply state: "I understand. It'shomework time." Restate as often as needed.

6. Make yourself available for help
7. Don't do the homework for her.
8. Make it fun.
9. Make the teacher part of your success team
10. Make sure your child is getting enough sleep.
11. If your child does not want to study, ask

*"What is my child trying to communicate?"
*resist controlling parental attitudes
*not capable of work
*learning disability
*low self-esteem
*child's method of learning needs are not being met
*sibling competition

Your Assignment This Week: Make a plan to talk to your school-age childabout her goals and study needs. Make sureshe has everything in place when school starts.

"By Stacey Zawel and Redirecting Children's Behaviorof the South Shore. Visit www.rcbsouthshore.com for additional articles and resources on parenting, care giving, and creating more peace."